Another Sunday…just like any other Sunday one year after the loss of a father.
Yesterday friends and family gathered for a celebration at the unique (much like the man himself) home my father, BP, had designed and built to live his life out in. Unfortunately, he never moved in. Yet the home is now complete and being enjoyed by his wife, Beth.
It was a gorgeous day to enjoy seeing many friends and sharing memories – and telling "BP’isms." My sister Shelly and I cooked food for all – serving some of BP’s favorites including his home-made hot-sauce recipe, home-made taco shells (both flour and corn cooked in heavy oils! Yummm!), chicken enchiladas, tamales, and guacamole. Hey, it was a free day, right?
We cooked and I only burned myself a few times on the hot oil while turning the taco shells. We successfully overserved nearly all who came by — not the least of all myself, as I am still suffering the overload today! (Ah, give me some strength! Full Strength, that is!)
As we enjoyed the BP style Mexican feast and savored a few "cold ones" we enjoyed a soundtrack of his most memorable music selections. So fitting and moving…
When we finally put a wrap on the day, packed the cars to head home we walked out front of the house to see a rainbow arching overhead. The two last ones standing (as in remaining) Beth (dad’s last wife) and I stood on the driveway and just stared at that rainbow.
You couldn’t help but feel that dad’s energy was near… as we’re left pondering the question: What is truly at the end of the rainbow, the arch of brilliant color we call LIFE.
(photography courtesy of my brother, Bill Phillips)
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Shawn, I was reading this, and it just struck me because December 8, 2008 my dad has been gone for eight years. I am still to some degree hurt and angry that he is gone, but yet know that he is able to breathe and full of life. I was telling my husband today that I still get those hurt and angry feelings, but there are little reminders of him every day around me, i.e. my son and daughter, my brother and his family. LIFE! I’m glad I read this. I love the rainbow. It’s just absolutely beautiful.
Hope
I just read this. Sorry it is belated but you have my sympathy. I lost my mother and best friend in August 2002 to cancer. I still grieve the loss, though not as intensely as I did at first. I still miss her a lot. Nine months later, in June 2003, my brother was shot to death in his home. We had several other deaths in the family that year as well including my children’s other grandma, who was a wonderful mentor to me in the christian faith. I miss my exhusband’s mexican family get togethers.(I now live in a different state than they do.) We had those nights where they fried tacos and invited all the aunts, uncles, cousins, friends and neighbors to bring ingredients, and they fried tacos and made hotsauce all night. The house and yard would be packed. There was always lots of laughing and joking at those gatherings. It was almost like a holiday.
Thank you for such a poignant posting! I do not ever respond to things on the web but I am struck at the similarities between your dear father’s passing and MY dear father’s passing. My loss will be 3 years this November and like you, we all thought my dad would be checking out of the hospital and back to his funny, sentimental, awesomely intelligent, maddening self! But that was not to be. Your rainbow is beautiful and what a gift to have a picture of it! I believe it is a sign from your father telling you that he loves you, misses you, and will see you on the other side. I had a similar experience coming back from my father’s funeral. As we were driving back home we saw the most magnificent red-fire sunset I have ever seen. Red was my dad’s favorite color and I know that sunset was from him letting us know that he was in a really beautiful place. Thanks so much for giving me this forum to express my sorrow for your loss and to remember and share my own loss. To end, I have a funny story about another sign from my father. On the day he died both of the toilets in my parent’s house stopped working. As we were trying to get a plumber out post haste to repair them my sister and I shared the thought that Dad was telling us that he was mad as all get out for dying and why not express it in the place(s) he spent a lot of quality time!
Shawn,
I’m just catching up on some of your blog entries and was touched by this story. Did you know that Julie Whitt (who loved your dad and family) loved “rainbows”? She specifed that the song, “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” be played at her funeral.
Whenever I see a rainbow, it makes me think of my creator’s promises and how he speaks to me through his magnificent creations.
What a beautiful symbol of his love to show up in the sky on the day that you were celebrating your Dad’s life!
Shawn – I just happened upon your website as I searched the net for info on getting into shape. I am sorry to hear of the loss of your father. I don’t know what your faith is but I believe that sometimes the Lord allows those who have gone before us the opportunity to look down at the “good stuff”. There is no doubt in my mind that your father was looking down on your family not only proud but filled with joy.
Your family has been such an inspiration to me as I work towards trying to help others live their best lives inside and out. We all go about it in our own way and my path is to be a minister and motivational speaker. Overcoming huge health obstacles after a car wreck has allowed me to gain compassion for others and be an example of not giving up. But I could not have done it without all of you. I just finished my degree and plan on spending some time taking my physique to the next level – and have inspired coworkers to take the step with me.
Anyway, I just wanted to send a word of encouragement and let you know that my life is a life you have impacted.
I will keep your family in my prayers and may you find favor in your future.
Aimee